“Hello friends. About a month ago my sister went to a get-a-way camp of sorts meant to show a different side of life and inspire new beginnings. As a nifty bonus, she unknowingly received letters from all of the family members and friends during the camp. Here was my 9 cents:

Dear Kelly,

Hopefully by the time you read this you’re not already so overwhelmed with emotion that my letter loses meaning – there are a lot of things I’d like to say. Mom and Dad told me, “”the letter should be inspirational and comforting. Make sure to say, ‘I love you,’ at least once.”"

I hope you’re not under the impression that when I say, “”I love you,”" it’s at the request of our parents, because that’s a little bit how I heard it. Kelly, I do love you and I’m extremely proud of you.

With that in mind, instead of drawing our relationship into a short novel, I’d like to take this chance to share with you some of the things I learned in high school, my first years of college, and now, as an exchange student in Japan.

Life is perspectives. Throughout existence humans go through various ways of seeing things. As children we watch life through careless glasses – everything is perfect. 30 minute recess and spelling tests – not exactly something to stress over. In junior high things become more difficult as the hormones begin to kick in. Pretty soon you’re worried more about what you look like than how you act. The first years in high school are a magnification of this perspective and one of the most difficult points in life. But at that time, you’re limited to the glasses you’ve already worn, unable to see with shades of the future. I’m wearing those right now: allow me to share my view.

Regardless of how hard either party tries, you’re going to fight with Mom and Dad. Realize when you’re in tears of fury, trying to figure out why Mom yelled at you or why Dad sat you down, it’s simply love. Without love, emotions cannot escalate. They’re trying their hardest to take care of you, even when it seems like the opposite. Dad once told me, “”the older you get, the smarter I’ll seem.”" At that time, I was unable to see how that perspective was possible. Now, he’s one of my role models. The way Mom took care of Grandpa for years on end is the most moving thing I’ve ever seen. Do your best to forgive our parents, and to forgive yourself. The sooner you do this, the easier things become for both parties.

Don’t drink and don’t smoke. I don’t care about the health effects – when you’re in high school, not only is it illegal, but at 16 reaching your hand into the hallucinogenic cookie jar is the worst choice you could ever make. I watched in horror as my piers lost themselves to the escape that is alcohol. The second you need ‘exterior elements’ to enjoy yourself, you’ve hit rock bottom. Instead, use your physical prowess and mental focus to explore the world around you. The more you practice this at a younger age, the more drugs and alcohol will become obsolete. Until this day I’ve never touched a can of beer or smoked a cigarette; enjoying yourself through challenge is the road less traveled, but much more rewarding.

Be a good person. “”Ah, I can’t believe how bad I did on that test, I wish I had studied more!”" “”Ah, I wish I had spent less time in front of the T.V. and more time working out!”" These are among the various miniscule regrets I had throughout high school. In retrospect I realize “”shikata ga nai,”" as the Japanese say. “”It simply can’t be helped.”" Don’t lose your head over frivolities. Instead, make sure you make the right ‘life decisions.’ I once read a book on Zen Buddhism which said, “”never speak poorly about someone else – never.”" This is the hardest thing you can possibly imagine, but also the quickest way to live a joyous life. The most valuable thing I’ve learned from college is that you really can’t judge a book by it’s cover. In general, people are good at heart. It’s the aspects we don’t know about them which leads us to create a negative image. That being said, before you open your mouth to say something cynical, think twice. We’ve led a life easier than 99.9% of the world, it’s simply rude to speak poorly about others. Given any opportunity, choose the one you won’t regret later. That way, even if you get a C on your Spanish test, you can take the grade with a smile. Do the right thing, search for the best in everyone.

I read somewhere the best way to close a paper is with a quote. I’ve chosen to steal words from someone that has helped me wake up with a smile nearly everyday for the past 3 years.

“”If you maintain a feeling of compassion, loving kindness, then something automatically opens your inner door. Through that, you can communicate more easily with other people. And that feeling of warmth creates a kind of openness. You’ll find that all human beings are just like you, so you’ll be able to relate to them more easily. That gives you a spirit of friendship. Then there’s less need to hide things, and as a result feelings of fear, self-doubt, and insecurity are automatically dispelled.”"

-His Holiness the Dalai Lama.

Do your best and shatter the expectations of those around you.

Love,

Kevin”

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